You want some crazy? I got your crazy!

I haven't slept in 4 days. My glowing eyes are driving me insane. Insane, I say! The giraffes are closing in. Free the waffle!

Mmmm! Delicious.

The Scorloon worlds are no more. The Walking Blackhole has devoured them. I've got awesome cosmic powers now that I need to try out. They were a bit vague on what these new abilities are. For one thing, my eyes now glow constantly. It looks awesome coming out of my mask eye holes, but is making it very difficult to sleep. I'm sure the other things I can do now are much cooler. Also, did you know that when the Walking Blackhole consumes a world he unhinges his jaw? Yeah. It's one of things you can never un-see.

Moon 5 is for carbon copies

Perhaps you have noticed the lapse in posting recently? (Or not.) Well, I have been wrapped up in tense negotiations with the Walking Blackhole! Okay, not the Walking Blackhole himself. He is as large as a dwarf star, which makes it difficult to talk man to man, er, Celestial Force. But 'ol Blackhole has a guy. A go-fer. A guy who finds him planets to sate his "unquenchable hunger." I know. How do you sate an unquenchable hunger? It doesn't really matter.

The point is that to find these planets the Blackhole has gifted vast cosmic energy to some dude to get the job done. Honestly, he mentioned that he was somethingsomething, Vanguard of the Walking Blackhole, but I didn't catch it. It's been a bit awkward having 2 weeks of negotiations with him when I can't remember his name. "Hey...there, you." "Yes, I agree... with you..." I don't think he's noticed though. His glowing visage doesn't seem too emotive, so it's hard to tell.

Anyway, the Scorloons control 3 planets in the system and 17 moons. Most of those are used for inventory storage and bookkeeping. When everything you do requires 15 forms, it takes up space (pun! ha!) fast. So in exchange for providing these delicious planetary snacks (and a couple of billion Scorloon lives) to the Walking Blackhole, he will endow me with a portion of his immeasurable power. So the deal: he doesn't eat me, and I get some sweet power upgrades.

That's what I call win-win.